How to Get Wife to Try Anal

Well, ain’t this a somethin’. Talkin’ ’bout this kinda stuff ain’t easy, ya know? But if you’re here, you’re probably thinkin’ ’bout it, and so’s your wife, maybe. This whole anal thing, it’s a bit… different, ain’t it? Let’s just talk plain, like we’re sittin’ on the porch swingin’ our feet.

First off, you gotta talk to her. Can’t just spring this on her like a surprise chicken dinner. Marriage, it’s about talkin’, sharin’, ya know? Sit down, maybe after supper, when the kids are in bed, and just say what’s on your mind. Don’t be all pushy, now. Just say somethin’ like, “Honey, I was readin’ somethin’, and it got me thinkin’… About us, and tryin’ somethin’ new.” See how she reacts. If she looks like you just sprouted a second head, back off a bit. If she’s curious, well, then you can keep talkin’.

Now, if she’s a bit scared, that’s normal. Heck, I was scared the first time I rode a horse, but then I loved it! So, you gotta make her feel safe and comfortable. Tell her it ain’t gonna be nothin’ wild and crazy right off the bat. It’s like learnin’ to bake a pie; gotta start with the crust, not the fancy lattice top. Maybe suggest startin’ slow, ya know? Like, with a finger, or maybe one of them… well, them little toys they sell at the store. Don’t go buyin’ the biggest one you see, for cryin’ out loud! Start small.

And another thing, lube, lube, lube! It ain’t like… well, you know… down there. It’s dry, and you gotta make it slippery. Think of it like greasin’ a pan before you fry an egg. You wouldn’t fry an egg in a dry pan, would ya? Same thing here. Get the good stuff, the slippery stuff, and don’t be stingy with it. Put it on your finger, put it on the toy, put it… well, you get the idea.

• Talk to her. Be open and honest, but don’t pressure her.
• Start slow. Don’t rush things. Take it one step at a time.
• Use plenty of lube. Make it comfortable for her.
• Listen to her. If she says stop, stop. It’s about both of you being happy.

And listen, this ain’t somethin’ you just do once and forget about. It’s like plantin’ a garden; gotta tend to it, water it, make sure it gets sunshine. Keep talkin’ to her, ask her how it feels, make sure she’s enjoyin’ it. And if she ain’t, don’t push it. There’s plenty of other ways to… well, you know… be close to your wife. Marriage ain’t about just one thing, it’s about all sorts of things. It’s about laughin’ together, cryin’ together, and sometimes, tryin’ new things together. But always, always, it’s about respectin’ each other.

Now, I ain’t no expert, but I’ve been married a long time, and I know a thing or two about how to keep things…interestin’. This anal stuff, it ain’t for everyone, but if you and your wife are curious, and you’re willin’ to take it slow and be respectful, well, it might just be somethin’ you both enjoy. Just remember, talkin’ is key. And plenty of that slippery stuff, don’t forget that!

One more thing, if you’re lookin’ for more information, there’s plenty of stuff online, just be careful what you click on, some of that stuff is just plain weird! Do your research, and don’t be afraid to ask questions… but maybe not to your mother-in-law, ya know? Some things are best kept between husband and wife.

Finally, remember it’s a two-way street. If she’s willin’ to try somethin’ new for you, you gotta be willin’ to do the same for her. Marriage is about givin’ and takin’, and findin’ ways to make each other happy. So, be patient, be kind, and be open, and who knows, you might just discover somethin’ new and wonderful together. And if not, well, there’s always that chicken dinner, right?