Howdy, y’all! Let’s gab a bit about listenin’ better when you’re hitched up with someone. You know, like when you’re courtin’ or married or whatever they call it these days.
Listenin’ ain’t just hearin’ words, ya hear? It’s about really gettin’ what your partner’s tryin’ to say. Like, when they’re goin’ on about their day, don’t just nod and think about what’s for supper. Pay attention! Look ’em in the eye, even if they ain’t lookin’ at you. Sometimes folks just need to talk it out, and they ain’t always lookin’ for you to fix it.
One big thing is, don’t be quick to jump in with blame. Like, if they’re fussin’ about somethin’, don’t go sayin’ “Well, you always do this!” or “It’s your fault!” Sometimes there’s a problem, and it just is. No need to go findin’ who done it, ya know? Just listen. Let ’em get it off their chest. It’s okay for there to be a problem without finding a cause. Really, it is.
- Show ’em you’re listenin’. Nod your head, lean in a little, say things like “Uh-huh” or “I see.” Don’t be lookin’ at your phone or the TV. That’s just plain rude. And it tells ’em you don’t care what they’re sayin’. Encourage your partner to keep sharin’ so you can better understand what they think.
- Don’t interrupt. Let ’em finish their thought, even if you think you know what they’re gonna say. Bite your tongue if you have to. You got two ears and one mouth, so listen twice as much as you talk, that’s what my old pappy used to say.
- Ask questions. But not sassy ones, ya hear? Ask things that show you’re tryin’ to understand. Like, “So, what happened then?” or “How did that make you feel?” But don’t push it if they ain’t ready to talk about everything all at once. Some things take time to come out.
Now, sometimes, you might be carryin’ around some baggage. You might be mad about somethin’ they did last week, or maybe you’re just stressed from work. But if you’re all riled up inside, you ain’t gonna be a good listener. So, take a deep breath. Try to let go of that anger or worry, at least for a little while. You gotta get your own self straightened out before you can listen to someone else.
And if you’re the one always talkin’, maybe try shuttin’ up for a spell and lettin’ your partner have a turn. It ain’t all about you, ya know? A good relationship is like a see-saw, gotta go back and forth. Sometimes you up, sometimes you down. Whether you’re a natural listener or you’re working on getting better at it, this skill is what lets you build the kind of relationship you’ve always wanted.
This listenin’ thing, it ain’t always easy. Sometimes, your partner might be sayin’ things you don’t wanna hear. Or maybe they’re complainin’ about somethin’ you don’t think is a big deal. But if you care about ’em, you gotta try. You gotta put in the effort to understand where they’re comin’ from. And sometimes it is a big deal to them, even if you can’t see it.
Think of it like this: you want them to listen to you, right? Well, they want you to listen to them too. It’s about respect, ya see? It’s about showin’ them that you value their thoughts and feelin’s. Feelings of intimacy and closeness can pull a relationship through hard times and help couples thrive when the relationship is good.
And don’t go gettin’ all anxious and stressed out about it. If you’re worried about something else, you won’t be able to listen good. So try and calm down. Take it one day at a time. If you mess up, apologize and try again. Resentment can also mess things up, so make sure you ain’t holdin’ a grudge. Check in with yourself to be sure you’re ready to listen. Anxiety, stress, and holding on to anger – those things can get in the way. So try to let go of those feelings. It ain’t easy, but it’s worth it.
So, there you have it. Some plain talk about listenin’ better. It ain’t rocket science, but it takes practice. And it’s somethin’ you gotta keep workin’ at, every day. This article provides a deep dive into the importance of active listening in relationships and offers practical tips to enhance your listening skills. Listening goes beyond just hearing the words. But if you put in the effort, you’ll have a stronger, happier relationship. And that’s somethin’ we all want, ain’t it?
Now, go on and read this with your loved one. Read this article together including tips. Maybe it will help you both out.
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